Drink Your Beer
Songs are songs.
Drink your beer.
Frozen Song (Tune to Let it Go)
Let it go. Let it go.
I can‘t hold it in anymore.
Let it go. Let it go.
So I took a piss outdoors.
And I don‘t care what you‘re going to say.
It‘s a small, small cock.
That’s why the cold doesn‘t bother me anyway.
69 Song (to ABBA’s Knowing me, Knowing you)
Sucking me, Licking you. Aha. 69‘s are fun to do
Sucking me, Licking you. Aha. 69‘s are fun to do with you.
Just try to keep your foot out my face until we’re both through.
Sucking me, Licking you. 69‘s fun to do.
S&M Girl
Who can pull your cock out?
Nail it to a tree.
Spank you on the ass until your cheeks begin to bleed.
Only my S&M girl. Yeah, she’s my S&M girl.
Who can grab your ball sack?
Stick it in a vice.
Squeeze those motherfuckers `till your you‘re screaming with delight.
Only my S&M girl. Yeah, she’s my S&M girl.
Who can take a Dildo?
One that‘s really long and hard.
Dip it in some chilly sauce and shove it up your ass.
Only my S&M girl. Yeah, she’s my S&M girl.
I love my S&M girl. My lovely S&M girl.
Itsy Bitsy (to the tune of Itsy Bitsy Yellow Polka Dot Bikini)
He‘s got an Itsy Bitsy teeny weeny microscopic little penis.
That‘s why he‘s never had sex before.
An Itsy Bitsy teeny weeny microscopic little penis.
And so he jerks off with a tweezers instead.
The Virus song (to the tune of Abba‘s Thank You for the Music)
Thank you for the virus.
The rash it‘s stinging.
Thanks for all the warts it‘s bringing.
Should have known I‘d catch it.
When you got down on your knees.
Your lips round my meat.
And all my cum spread all over your teeth.
So I say thanks for Gonorrhea.
For giving it to me.
The Lubrication song ( to the tune of Kylie Minogue‘s The Locomotion)
If it feels a little tight and he can‘t get it in now.
C‘mon Baby, use some lubrication.
Your lips are feeling dry and he can‘t find your clit now.
C‘mon Baby, use some lubrication.
Well if you like it wet and slippy and to glide in with ease.
Remember what to do when on your hands and knees.
So c‘mon, c‘mon. Use some lubrication
C‘mon, c‘mon. A lot of lubrication.
C‘mon, c‘mon. Use some lubrication with me.
Just gotta lube those lips now.
Twinkle Twinkle Little Hasher
Melody – Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star
Twinkle, twinkle, little hasher,
Can’t you suck a little faster?
Down upon my meat so slow,
Like a whale about to blow,
Twinkle, twinkle, little hasher,
Can’t you suck a little faster?
Slack bladder were, Slack bladder… (pissed on trail song)
My name is Jack
My name is Jack (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
I’m a necrophiliac (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
I fuck dead women (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
And I fill ’em full of jism (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah).
I get frustrated (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
When they’re cremated (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
Cause try as I must (nah-na-nah-na-nah-na-nah),
I can’t fuck dust!
Notes: This song is sung by the RA with the rest of the circle responding with the portion in parentheses. The final line is often shouted by everyone for emphasis.
Variant: We came up with way too many verses of this one time – sing at your own risk.
My name is Gus
I’m incestuous
I fucked my mother
And buggered my brother
But when they die
I will not cry
Cuz just like Jack
I’m a necrophiliac
My name is Kyle
I’m a pedophile
I fuck little boys
I get ’em with toys
If I have a son
I’ll be much fun
Cause just like Gus
I’m incestuous
My name is Nick
I’m a narcoleptic
I … ZZZZZZZzzzzzz
We’ve got virgins, we’ve got Virgins.
We’ve got virgins, we’ve got Virgins.
On Our Trail, on our trail.
Got to get them Fcked up Got to get them Fcked up
One by one. One by One
Theres a Bear in the deep dark woods-Yogi
Theres a Bear in the deep dark woods-Yogi
Yogi – Has a little friend – BooBoo
BooBoo has a girl friend-Cindy
Cyndy has a shaven snatch-Grizly
Cyndy likes it on the ice-Polar
Suzi likes it up the rear – Dirty
Yogi has a cheesy knob- Camen
BooBoo likes it upside down -Koala
Yogi has a 12inch C*ck- Black Bear
BooBoo says he has one too lier lier
Yogi’s white and Cindy’s black -Panda
Jovi has an M16. Right to, Right to bear
More that I can bear.
El Camino
The Front is like a car, the back is like a trunk.
The front is where you drive, the back is where you, El Camino…
You take it to the whorehouse you take it to the store.
In the front you put you beer the back you put your, El Camino
The frount is where you fck and the back is where you fck
She’ll be coming round the mountain.
She’ll be puffing like a steam train when she cums,
She’ll be puffing like a steam train when she cums,
She’ll be puffing like a steam train, puffing like a steam train,
She’ll be puffing like a steam train when she cums
Chorus:
Singing God, I’m coming, don’t stop now,
Singing God, I’m coming, don’t stop now,
Singing God, I’m coming, God I’m coming,
God, I’m coming, don’t stop now
How the money rolls in
Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean.
My father makes books on the corner,
My mother makes illicit gin,
My sister sells kisses to sailors,
My god how the money rolls in!
Chorus:
Rolls in, rolls in,
My god how the money rolls in, rolls in,
Rolls in, rolls in, my god how the money rolls in
My mother’s a bawdy house keeper,
Each night when the evening grows dim,
She hangs out a little red lantern,
My god how the money rolls in!
Chorus
My cousin’s a Harley street surgeon,
With instruments long, sharp and thin,
He only does one operation,
My god how the money rolls in!
Chorus
Uncle Joe is a registered plumber,
His business in holes and in tin,
He’ll plug up your hole for a tenner,
My god how the money rolls in!
Question…(sing when the RA accidentally says the word “question”
How would, you like, my finger in your ear?
How would, you like, my finger in your ear?
Oh no, not fucking likely, not fucking likely, not fucking lihikely.
How would, you like, my finger in your rear?
How would, you like, my finger in your rear?
Oh no, not fucking likely, not fucking likely, not fucking lihikely.
THE HASH PRAYER
OUR LAGER WHICH ART IN BARRELS
HALLOWED BE THY DRINK
THY WILL BE DRUNK , (I will be drunk)
AT HOME AS IT IS IN THE PUB
GIVE US THIS DAY OUR FOAMY PINT
AND FORGIVE US OUR SPILLAGES
AS WE FORGIVE THOSE WHO SPILL AGAINST US
AND LEAD US NOT INTO PONCEY WINE DRINKING
BUT DELIVER US FROM HANG-OVERS
FOR THINE IS THE BEER, THE BITTER AND THE LAGER
FOR EVER AND EVER
BAR MEN
Dough (sound of music tune)
Dough, the stuff, that buys me beer,
Ray, the guy who serves me beer,
Me, the guy, who drinks me beer,
Fa, a long way to the beer,
So, I’ll have another beer,
La, I’ll have another beer,
Tea, no thanks I’ll have a beer,
And that brings us back to,
Down, down, down,down…
Down Down Down Your Beer
Tune: row your boat
Down, down, down your beer
To pay for all your crimes
Quit complaining about the taste
It isn’t Piss/Sperm this time
Blow, blow, blow his cock,
Gently like a dream.
Carefully, carefully, carefully, carefully
Till your mouth is filled with cream.
Shitty Trail
S.H.I.T.T.Y., T.R.A.I.L.
Shitty trail (it sucked!), shitty trail (it was shit!),
the hares have gone and laid a shitty trail!
I would rather drink a beer than run your shitty trail,
S.H.I.T.T.Y. T.R.A.I.L.
He ought to be pissed on
He ought to be publicly pissed on.
He ought to be publicly shot (Bang Bang!)
He ought to be tied to a urinal
And kept there to fester and rot.
(Sometimes mooning the recipient)
20 Toes
There is a game of twenty toes.
It’s played all over town.
The girls, they play with ten toes up.
The boys with ten toes down, down….
His one-skin..
His One-Skin (my bonny tune)
His one skin hangs down to his two skin,
His two skin hangs down to his three,
His three skin hangs down to his foreskin,
His foreskin hangs down to his knee.
Roll back, roll back,
Roll back my foreskin for me, for me.
Roll back, roll back,
Oh, roll back his foreskin for me.
Drink it down, down, down, down
Why was he born so beautiful
Why was he born so beautiful?
Why was he born to all?
He’s no fucking use to anyone.
He’s no fucking use at all.
He may be a joy to his mother.
But he’s a pain in the asshole to me.
So drink it down down down down
Frenchman
Tune: French anthem
A Frenchman went to the lavat’ry
For to have a jolly good shit, shit, shit,
He pulled his pants and trousers down
So that he could revel in it, it, it,
But when he reached for the paper,
He found that someone had been there before….
Où est le papier? Où est le papier?
Monsieur, Monsieur, j’ai fait manure.
Où est le papier?
Give It a Blow
Tune: Let it Snow
Well, the weather outside is frightful,
But his dick is so delightful.
If you really want to see it grow,
Give it a blow, give it a blow, give it a blow.
Girls’ version:
Her tits are so delightful,
So if you want to see her fuck,
Give’m a suck, give’m a suck, give’m a suck.
Cougar
Tune: Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
Cougar, cougar on the prowl.
Get that guy to make you growl!
Now the cougar’s in a cage.
Oops! That guy was underage.
Cougar, cougar don’t you frown.
Now it’s time to drink it …down down…
God save the beer
Tune: God Save the Queen
All Hashers hear our call!
Raise glass and stand up tall!
Join us and sing.
For drunken revelry,
And no more chastity,
We drink our toast to thee:
“God Save the Beer!”
Fairy
He doesn’t go out with the girls no more,
the neighbourhood boys are weary.
He sits at home and beats his meat. Poof, he’s a fairy.
How much beer has he been drinking?
Tune: Ode to Joy (Beethoven)
Audio Here: http://tinyurl.com/5r23ge
How much beer has he been drinking? he is looking really lit.
As we stand here, aren’t we thinking, do we really give a shit?
Who’s this wanker, so unseemly, that his mom would surely frown?
Grab your beer and hold it tightly, drink it, drink it down down down
Down Down Down Down Down Down Down Down Down Down etc…
Love Me Tender
Love me Tender, Love me sweet
Wrap your lips around my meat
Watch me smile and watch me grin
As my cum rolls down, down down down
Syphilitic HH
Some die of drinking water,
And some of drinking beer,
Some die of constipation,
And some of diarrhea.
But of all the world’s diseases,
There’s none that can compare,
With the drip, drip, drip of the syphilitic prick
Of a Hash House Harrier
Hashing brother
This is our hashing brother,
He goes from one hash to another.
We’ve never seen him with a lover,
We think he might be gay.
It’s raining
It’s raining
It’s pouring
Sex with you is boring
Went to bed
With your brother / sister instead
And woke up not so horny
Masturbation
Tune:“Alouette”
Masturbation, I like masturbation.
Masturbation, I like to masturbate.
(Harriettes:) With a little cucumber, with a little cucumber.
In it goes, out it goes,
(Hashers:) with a little blow-up doll with a little blow up doll
In he goes, out he goes
All: Ooooh, I sigh,
Aaaahhh, I cry,
Mahahahasturbation..
I like Masturbation..
She’ll be coming……
Tune: “She’ll be coming round the mountain
She’ll be huffing like a freight train when she cums,
She’ll be huffing like a freight train when she cums,
She’ll be huffing like a freight train, huffing like a freight train,
She’ll be huffing like a freight train when she cums.
CHORUS:
Singing God, I’m coming, don’t stop now,
Singing God, I’m coming, don’t stop now,
Singing God, I’m coming, God I’m coming,
God, I’m coming, don’t stop now
drink it down, down, down….
Mailman
I’m Your Mailman
Here I cum, down your way,
I can come twice a day,
I’m your mailman.
I can come in any kind of weather,
Don’t you know my bags are made of leather?
I don’t mess with keys or locks,
I’ll just stick it in your box,
I’m your mailman.
Drink it down down down down…
Hashers, meet the hashers
Hashers, meet the hashers,
They’re the biggest drunks in history,
From the town of Zürich,
They’re the leaders in debauchery.
Half minds, trailing shiggy through the years,
Watch them as they down a lot of beers,
Down down, down down down down
Wonderful morning
Oh what a wonderful morning,
Oh what a wonderful day.
I got the wonderful feeling,
Everything’s going to shit
A small dick
Tune: It’s a small small world
Well, it isn’t long and it isn’t thick,
It grows to slow and it comes too quick
It gets lost in a twat,
But it’s all that he’s got,
It’s small, small dick.
CHORUS:
It’s a small dick after all,
It’s a small dick after all,
Always limp from alcohol,
it’s a small, small dick.
Mrs Murphy
Take it in your hand Mrs Murphy
For it only ways a quarter of a pound
It’s got hair on its neck like a turkey (gobble, gobble!)
And it spits when you rub it up and down, down, down
Here’s to Brother Hasher
Here’s to brother (sister) hasher,
Bother hasher, brother hasher,
Here’s to brother hasher,
May he chug-a-lug.
He’s happy, he’s jolly,
He’s fucked up by golly,
Here’s to brother hasher,
May he chug-a-lug.
He’s the Meanest
He’s the meanest,
He sucks the horse’s penis,
He’s the meanest,
He’s a horse’s ass.
All he does is pound it,
Ever since he found it,
He’s the meanest,
He’s a horse’s ass.
He’s always pissing on us,
He’s rotten and dishonest,
He’s the meanest,
He’s a horse’s ass.
Drinking down, down, down, down,
Put your left leg over my shoulder
Melody – Side by Side
Put your left leg over my shoulder,
Put your right leg over my shoulder,
(wag tongue)
La la la la la, la la la la, la la la.
Put your left tit over my shoulder,
Put your right tit over my shoulder,
(shake head)
Bla bla bla bla bla, bla bla bla bla, bla bla bla.
A Soldier
Asshole, asshole,
A soldier I will be,
To piss, to piss,
Two pistols on my knee,
To fight for the old cunt,
Fight for the old cunt,
fight for the old country
Asshole, asshole,
Asshole, asshole,
A soldier I will be.
HEAD!
(sing when the RA or anyone else in the circle accidentally says the word “head”)
Head?
Who said head?
I’ll take some of that,
So I did, and it was good
And there was much rejoicing.
We fucked for hours
Uprooting trees & bushes & flowers,
We fucked like Vikings
With horns on our HEAD!
HEAD? Who said head?
We don’t want women with good taste,
We want women that taste good!
He’s got a dose of the Clap
(Clap rhythmically)
He’s got a dose of the clap, on his dick,
He’s got a dose of the clap, on his dick,
He’s got a dose of the clap, on his dick,
And it goes drip, drip, drip,.drip..
Drink it down, down, down . .
With an F, With an F, With an F-U-C
To the tune of the William Tell Overture
With an F, with an F
With an F-U-C
With an F-U-C-K-Y-O-U
With an F, with an F
With an F-U-C
With a K, Y-O-U
Masturbation
Tune: “Funiculi, Funicula”
Last night I stayed up late and masturbated,
It felt so good, I knew it would.
Last night I stayed up late to masturbate,
It felt so nice, I did it twice.
You should have seen me on the short strokes,
It felt so grand, I used my hand,
And you should have seen me on the long strokes,
It felt so neat, I used my feet.
Chorus:
Shake it, break it, beat it on the floor,
Smash it, bash it, thrust it through the door,
Some people seem to think that fornication’s rather grand,
But for all-around enjoyment, I would rather use my hand!
Hash House Harriers
Tune: the Adams Family Theme
Chorus:
Duh-duh-duh-duh, (snap snap (with fingers))
Duh-duh-duh-duh, (snap snap)
Duh-duh-duh-duh,
Duh-duh-duh-duh,
Duh-duh-duhduh. (snap snap)
Their running is convulsive,
Their drinking is compulsive.
They’re morally repulsive,
The Hash House Harriers.
Chorus
Their flatulence is rude and,
Their genitals protrude when,
They’re running in the nude oh,
The Hash House Harriers.
Chorus
They’re always shiggy tracking,
From constantly bushwacking.
Intelligence they’re lacking,
The Hash House Harriers.
Don’t mess my Hairdo
Tune: Bonanza theme
Chorus: Get it up, get it in, get it out
Don’t mess my hairdo
You’ve got a dick, but you should lick
So move that tongue around
Hit the spot, make me hot,
I will scream out loud
Get it up, get it in, get it out
Don’t mess my hairdo
You’ve got a dick, but you should lick
So move that tongue around
(if sung as a down down song: drink it down down down)
Suck my toes, insert your hose
Make my juices flow
Get it up, get it in, get it out
Don’t mess my hairdo
You’ve got a dick, but you should lick
So move that tongue around
When I have cum, and I am done
We’ll start another round
Get it up, get it in, get it out
Don’t mess my hairdo
You’ve got a dick, but you should lick
So move that tongue around
Swing Low
Chorus:
Swing Lo, Sweet Chariot
Cumming for to Carry Me Home
Swing Lo, Sweet Chariot
Cumming for to Carry Me Home
I looked over Jordan, and what did I see?
Cumming for to Carry Me Home
A band of angels, cumming after me,
Cumming for to Carry Me Home
(Chorus)
If you get there, before I do!
Cumming for to Carry Me Home
Tell all my friends,
I’m cumming too.
Cumming for to Carry Me Home
(Chorus)
Sometimes, I’m up, Sometimes, I’m down
Cumming for to Carry Me Home
But I knows in my soul,
I’m heaven bound,
Cumming for to Carry Me Home
(Chorus)
Reaggea Version: sing first verse, clap the rhythm, and swing your body
Humming Version: Hum the tune, shout out loud every “Cumming”
Silent Version: think the tune, shout out loud every “Cumming”
Men’s version: sing ” Swing Lo, Sweet Chariot, Cumming ” then tilt your head to the side and make snoring sounds.
Girl’s version: sing ” Swing Lo, Sweet Chariot, Cumming, cumming, cumming, cumming…..” leaning back with your hands behind your head and your pelvis thrust forward
RA says:
MAY THE HASH GO IN PEACE,
Pack says:
MAY THE HASH GET A PIECE!
The money rolls in
My father makes illegal whisky,
My mother makes illicit gin,
My sister sells sin on the corner,
My God how the money rolls in.
Chorus :
Rolls in, rolls in, my God how the money rolls in, rolls in,
Rolls in, rolls in, my God how the money rolls in.
My mother’s a bawdy house keeper,
Every night when the evening grows dim,
She hangs out a little red lantern,
My God how the money rolls in.
Chorus
My brother’s a curate in Torquay,
He’s saving poor girlies from sin,
He’ll save you a blonde for a guinea,
My God how the money rolls in.
Chorus…..
My grandpa makes cheap prophylactics,
He punctures the head with a pin.
[POP!]
My Grandma, does back room abortions,
And oh, how the money rolls in.
Chorus…..
Uncle Tommy was once in a prison,
Where he was a joy to the men,
But now he bends over for business,
My God how the money rolls in.
Chorus…..
Hitler Has Only Got One Ball
Tune: “Colonel Bogey March”
Hitler
Has only got one ball
Goering
Has two, but very small
Himmler
Has something similar
But poor old Goebbels
Has no balls
At all
Hold It in Your Hand, Mrs. Murphy
Hold it in your hand, Mrs. Murphy
It only weighs a quarter of a pound
It’s got hair round its neck like a turkey
And it spits when you jerk it up and down, down, down, down….
Hymn
Hymn, hymn
Fuck him